Sunday, December 27, 2020

One book a day.

Whenever someone tells me they finished a book in one day, I will usually talk under my breath about it being a few paged book or they had nothing much to do that day hence the reason they finished that quick as I will spend a week on a book averagely.

 Well sometimes the low voice Timi was wrong as some of them have busy daily schedules, and still finish 200 paged books and above. I admired them, I truly did and didn’t think I could, talk less of accomplishing such feat during the holiday. Then I did, it was on Christmas Day 2020 through to Boxing Day in less than 24 hours with a busy schedule, I finished “Never Grow Up” by Jackie Chan, a 333 page book. 

I did it, autobiographies have always been my favourites, this was no exception I learnt about having values to be successful, staying persistent, being a go getter, improving skills, going back to the drawing board, redoing things until they are right, practising several times, working with teams, knowing what you want and having breaks for family, friends and yourself.

Jackie knew the kind of movies he wanted to act in and initially he didn’t get that, he acted in what he got and eventually a breakthrough came. That’s an important lesson; while learning, improving and getting knowledge is important having something doing is better than being idle, his break might have never come if he didn’t start out on those other acting jobs he didn’t really like. I could relate that to someone doing a job they really do not like, stay on it while you search for a better opportunity, so long it doesn’t affect your well-being, if it does please don’t stay. 

It was an interesting read which highlighted different stages of his career and personal life. 

*searching through my library for my next read*


Thursday, March 19, 2020

Today's world

Today 19th March 2020 is the first day of Spring in the Northern half of the world and the first day of Autumn in Australia, that is today is the vernal equinox and autumnal equinox in northern and southern hemisphere respectively. That is for geography while in the world today the cause for alarm is the Coronavirus, I understand that we are all bracing up, running to the shops to get groceries and toiletries. We are also getting fruits from the local farmers' market all in a bid to beat whatever the outcome of this virus is. As much as we are preparing physically I hope we are also preparing spiritually and getting our hearts prepared. I pray that we will all come out of this alive, stronger, more humane, more caring, understanding and tolerable of each other. 

Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

As much as we would like the pandemic to be far away it's closer than we think. For once I have checked that doubt in me that we are far away and disconnected as a people as I like to claim that I am a lone-ranger, in fact, I am not. We are closely knitted together than we think and connected than we can imagine. With this pandemic and the rate of infection from one person to another, I have come to the realization that we ought to show more love, give much more, live freely and always strive to leave this earth better than we found it. I hope this makes us think about how we are connected and not otherwise. 

You just never know where and how far your grocery has been and travelled from, who is handling what you are buying from the grocery store, or who packed your toiletries or who washed your apples and pears in the fruit section.

The world is smaller than we think and this should be a lesson to us all for good, to treat people better, love endlessly, give generously and take care of ourselves as we are not doing it for ourselves but for our world.

Loads of love from me to you, do not forget to keep good hygiene now and always.

Sunday, March 8, 2020

An ode to women

To the women, who loved me,
To the women, who didn't,
To the women, who enabled me,
To the women, who enlightened me,

To the women, who kept me safe,
To the women, who exposed me,
To the women, who raised me,
To the women, who put me down,

To the women, who corrected me.
To the women, who castigated me,
To the women, who thought me,
To the women, who ignored me,

Photo by Chelsi Peter from Pexels

To the women, who nurtured me,
To the women, who guided me,
To the women, who embraced me,
To the women, who encouraged me,

To the women, who loved me,
To the women, who didn't,
To the women, who are family,
To the women, who are friends,

To the women, I knew,
To the women, I know,
To the women, I will know,
Happy International Women's Day

Thursday, March 5, 2020

Grateful for the good things in my life

The first good thing I am grateful for is Family: The relationship I have with my family is very special.

Often they are the people who know me in ways no one else does, and I am able to share things with them that I should not share with other people.

The second good thing I am grateful for is my Husband: Almost all adults seek to be in a close or intimate relationship with another adult. We

Two people in a relationship can seek pleasure from being physically and socially intimate. People in a relationship can depend on each other and share thought and feelings together

Thirdly I am grateful for my friends: Unlike my family members, I do not have a biologically established link to my friends. I can make friends with whomever I choose, and that is important. My friends and I support and care for one another and look after each other's needs. I can share activities with my friends.

In addition, I am grateful for a home: It is my place of safety and I control what happens in it. I have my privacy and I can be with my loved ones 

Furthermore, I am grateful for work: it is fulfilling, it makes me productive and also helps me to contribute to society. Importantly, work gives me money which I can use to pay my bills, save, invest and control my life to an extent.

Community is a good thing for me and grateful that I can live my life and use resources from my community and also contribute to it. 

Lastly, I am grateful for Faith, I have been able to develop personal and social companionship while growing spiritually. 

Friday, February 28, 2020

Don't mind them

"Don't mind them" these words translated from Yoruba are the words my mother will say to me each time I came to her with complaints from detractors. She would say "ma da won loun" which literally means "don't answer them" but figuratively means "don't mind them".

The first time she said those words to me was after service on one bright and beautiful Sunday morning, I had worn my favourite dress and one and a half-inch heel covered shoe, I was so radiant and my confidence could be felt miles away. I think I had just gotten my Common Entrance result and I was too happy to be bothered by anything in the world.

I bounced gallantly to pre-teen church for Sunday school and I am sure my teacher must have felt the confidence radiating within me, she asked me to pray for people who were not feeling too fine and she did allocate the other prayer points to the other folks in the class, I was to go first, so after saying the thanksgiving prayers I  began saying these words "Father Lord, please heal all those that are ill".  Immediately she said "stop Rotimi", in my pre-teen mind I thought I had prayed amiss alas brothers and sisters in Christ that was the day I knew I had the Yoruba H-Factor, my Sunday school teacher asked me to repeat myself after saying the same thing 5 times but it was still not right in her ears, she asked someone else to pray, the smart girl said, "God please make all the sick people well". The prayers went round and service finished as it should.

My confidence began to dwindle and I was not having it, however, I wasn't going to let that slip so when I got home that day, I told my mum what had happened and she said: "ma da won loun". You see initially I will think much of these things but then having h-factor doesn't mean I will fail an English test, or my prayers won't be answered. My teacher well understood what my prayer was but she was not pleased with my pronunciation of the words heal and ill.

The truth is, I cannot change my Yoruba H-factor, you wouldn't even know I had it if no words beginning with 'H' had to be said in our conversations. Most of my folks strongly believe I have a foreign accent, a story for another day.

In reality, we all have imperfections that are really negligible as they don't dent the fabric of our personality and so if someone tries to call you out on your perfect imperfections please don't mind them. 

Friday, February 21, 2020

Delayed gratification

As a child, I often kept my chocolate bar, cookie or snack till later. I would bring it out like a treasured jewel when others had finished theirs and long-forgotten they were candies given. It always felt like a treasure of some sort when I brought mine out, I would usually do this in grand style and I will begin to nimble it slowly with panache, I am sure all that did spite the fast, non-patient eaters. I know this is more like self-delayed gratification but from these childhood experience I realized how much it meant to save now and enjoy later,

Photo by from Pexels

I did practise this with my secondary school served meals as well as I did not like certain foods, however, I had to eat then during agro period (A week or two to visiting days when you out of provisions) and I always used the meat on my meal as a gratification to be enjoyed later after my meal. The meat was usually fried fish or beef. I would eat this last and nimble on it slowly so the juices slowly burst into my mouth. Back then I used the meat as a reward for eating the not so delicious and appetizing meals we got served. Over the years I have used this method in real-life cases like studying so hard, being diligent at work and what have you. 

I know it is never easy to work for so long and not get some sort of reward or recognition, but eventually, this things come and when it does, it just feels right you would be feeling like a young child eating a chocolate cookie when others had finished theirs. You will be glad you waited as you will be greatly rewarded. 

 "Galatians 6:9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."

Delayed gratification could also be when you work hard in school or at work and the result you get is not immediate but it eventually comes in good grades or promotion and recognition. Sometimes you would have forgotten you worked so hard for the rewards you are getting. Those beautiful and bountiful rewards eventually come and you will be glad you did not hurry or take short cuts. 

I will like to leave with this eventually your cookie is going to be yours it's been handed to you by the creator. It might not be in your reach now but it definitely not out of your reach. 

Thursday, February 13, 2020

Lessons from my biology class

It takes two to tango is an idiom that I have heard since I was little child, it made more sense in my late teen years and early adult life as I have seen that it takes two people who are intentional to make a relationship work.

When I say relationship here, I don't mean only love-relationship, I mean all kinds of relationship that we have from family to friendship to the relationship at work or church and so on and so forth. Where ever and however the interaction might come about we need to be deliberate and intentional. 

I have put all the different relationships I have had into two broad groups. I have done this based on lessons from my biology class in secondary school. I know there are a lot more than two types of ecological relationships but from my understanding of humans, I have come to the conclusion that our relationships are either parasitic or mutually symbiotic. I will explain further:

I. A relationship is parasitic when only one person or party does the work of building, watering, celebrating, sharing information and what have you while the other person or party just benefit from all of these and fails to reciprocate. This folk or these folks would zap and keep zapping and taking without ever giving back or returning the favour. In this instance, the first person can be referred to as the host while the other person is a parasite.

II. However, in a mutually symbiotic relationship both parties do the work and mutually benefit from the relationship, no one feels left out as the work of building the relationship is on the shoulders of both parties and not relegated to only one party. Everyone involved is usually intentional about growth and I will say this is the kind of relationship I'd like. 

"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in."Morrie Schwartz, from Tuesdays with Morrie

I want to have friends who will go all out for me like I will for them, I don't want to feel like the host or parasite as it may, in my friendship, relationship, family, workplace, church and wherever it is I will be. Sometimes we enjoy being the parasite because we are getting all the goodies that we didn't work and that's a nice place to be but not for so long, as overtime our host will get worn out like the host from the parasitic relationship in biology class. So what do we do find another host?

Let's not be the person that would only come around when they need to zap, be the person that is always there. I hope we grow in our relationships and have mutually beneficial relationships henceforth. 

Happy Valentine.